New To therapy? a guide to get your started

Feeling nervous about starting therapy? Learn what to expect in your first session, how to find the right therapist, and why trust and safety take time to build.

Your First Therapy Session: What Actually Happens

Okay, so you booked your first therapy session and now you’re likely experiencing a mixture of excitement, pride, anxiety and stress. Am I right? This is totally normal! I am a therapist and I also feel this exact way when starting my own therapy with a new therapist. Let’s talk about it.

It is completely normal to feel nervous at the first, and sometimes second and third, therapy appointments. You’re heading into an appointment with a complete stranger to talk about things that are vulnerable and emotional. of COURSE you’re going to feel nervous!

There is No Pressure to Unpack Everything At Once

A lot of clients come into their first session and think they have to spill all the tea, share every piece of personal information that they have, or just feel a little lost on the process. What I personally love to do in first therapy appointments is actually guide you through just a regular old conversation where, yes, we do talk about some personal things, but there will likely be some laughter and ease thrown in there too.

My literal job is to help you feel comfortable, and from the moment you step into my office, this is what I am aiming to accomplish. here are a few things you can expect from your first therapy session:

• A warm welcome and a conversation about what brought you in

• A few intake questions (history, symptoms, goals, concerns)

• Space to share what feels important right now

• A chance to ask questions - about the process, boundaries, or even your therapist’s style

Is My Therapist The Right Fit For Me?

Arguably the MOST important factor in therapy that determines success of reaching your goals is the therapeutic alliance - AKA, therapist-client fit. This is sometimes apparent immediately, within minutes, with your therapist, and sometimes only solidifies over the course of a few sessions.

Here’s What to Look For:

• feeling emotionally safe

  • you definitely don’t need to spill everything right away, but you should feel like you could eventually.

• feeling seen and understood

• Feeling like you can be honest

• feelings like your therapist respects your space

• feeling a sense of forward movement

  • This doesn’t mean dramatic breakthroughs every session, but a general sense that things are shifting, softening, or making more sense.

You Don’t Have to Be an Open Book Immediately

It is completely normal to feel a bit guarded, unsure of what to say, share small surface level things at first. Over time, the goal is that you build safety to open up about more and more, this is all part of the therapeutic process.

Starting therapy is brave. Staying in therapy is brave. Being honest—especially when it’s hard - is brave.

Wherever you are in your healing journey, know that you don’t have to hurry, perform, or be perfect. You just need to show up. The rest can be navigated together, one session at a time.

Warmly,

Britney Bingham, MACP, LCT, Owner of Kindred Counselling